August 2011
Aug 1st
162 notes
July 2011
I can’t stop making clothes. Holy shit, I spent all day making clothes for myself with some cheapass fabric my mom’s friend gave me. It’s been a while since I used my sewing machine so I’m an amateur all over again. I can’t run it as straight anymore. So I’ve been just making plain tank tops for me to wear under some of my see-through shirts as practice. I...
Jul 30th
1 note
One day, I’ll be super cute. I’ll be exceptionally pretty one day. I’ll be so thin and gorgeous. And everyone will love me. Including myself. 
Jul 30th
4 notes
Jul 30th
57 notes
what ze fuck
My mom likes it when I call her “my nigga.” She said it makes her feel cool. HAHA. Mama my nigga. 
Jul 30th
3 notes
Oh my god. Watching that saddest commercial ever thing while being on my period and not have taken any anti-depressants for the entire week is definitely not a good idea.
Jul 30th
1 note
the idea of love scares me
How would anyone possibly fall in love with me. How could I even think about loving someone so much that they become a big part of me. And how on earth would it be possible to find someone who loves me as much as I love them? How does it happen? Still, I want to experience it so much that it scares me.
Jul 29th
4 notes
3 tags
Jul 29th
297 notes
I’m watching City Hunter with my mom and we were watching the scene where Lee MinHo is washing the girl’s hair and they start play fighting. And since I’m a lonely miserable girl, I started saying, “Heh, me too. Me too.” Then my mom says, “Go do it by yourself.” She really thinks of me as a loser daughter. 
Jul 29th
3 notes
OMG YOU GUYS
CYWORLD HAS BEEN HACKED. HOW ON EARTH AM I GOING TO STALK MY FAVORITE ULZZANGS. DSKA;HOIVFHBKLVBHUSAOE;RFDA 
Jul 29th
2 notes
Sometimes, I’m so fucking desperate for a boyfriend. He doesn’t need to call me every day. We don’t even need to see each other every day. I don’t need a full report of what each day was like for him. I’m not going to worry over who he’s meeting or what he might be doing with whom.  I just get real fucking desperate for someone who makes me feel appreciated and...
Jul 29th
14 notes
There are some people in the world who just make it so simple to leave people out of groups. Pray tell, what sort of joy do you feel in other’s misery?
Jul 29th
isn't it strange
I put on so much make-up, I spend an hour on my outfit, I lose weight to give off some illusion that I have long legs, and still, no one sees me as a girl. I’m a bro to everyone. What is this.
Jul 29th
5 notes
I remember when he looked through my sketchbook with total amazement. I think that was the moment he seemed different to me. He made me feel like I had real talent that made me stand out from the rest. I don’t remember the last time someone made me feel that way before he did. I greatly appreciated it.
Jul 29th
I feel like if we have had a bit more of time together, I might have started to see him as more than just a friend. That childish face, those beautiful fingers, his ringing laughter, the height that makes my neck bend backward completely, and that sweet, sweet smile that I can never take my eyes off. But before all that, his kind nature that doesn’t seem to get annoyed by the kind of person...
Jul 29th
1 note
4 tags
Jul 27th
13 notes
Remember the last words you said to me? “I’m going to miss you.” My fucking ass, you shitbag. 
Jul 27th
I woke up in the middle of the night and I can’t go back to sleep. I’m already having thoughts about staying in New York for forever. I really can’t wait. But who knows, it might be a lot different from what I’m really expecting so I’ll just have to wait and see. When I think about maybe staying in California for the friendships I’ve made here, honestly, I...
Jul 27th
Last night was quite an episode. I was just about to fall asleep from the side effects of my pills when my mom was trying to close the balcony door for me so I won’t be cold while sleeping. But MooMoo, my dear charmante little house cat, was intently staring at the balcony and refusing to move so my mother would close the door. Then she started to lower her head and bite at something. By...
Jul 26th
3 notes
Jul 26th
3,022 notes
I’m being a good little child and going to church this weekend. I came back from Friday night service and I have to wake up early to go to tomorrow’s early morning service and then the evening service. The pastor this time is speaking about forgiveness. Today he spoke mostly about forgiveness within family. It was a very moving sermon. Everyone’s have had hurt from their parents...
Jul 23rd
FedEx is by far the worst delivery company
They don’t even try to make an effort to get my package into my hands. All they want is have it easy and basically have me get the package myself from them from some unknown location. Even customer service was fighting us while I was trying to explain what was going on. When I was telling them that the door tag was in the lobby rather than the front door, they said, “Your neighbor must...
Jul 23rd
4 notes
In-N-Out three days in a row. Jelly? 
Jul 23rd
2 notes
may i have this for my birthday LOL →
Jul 23rd
1 note
Pray for Somalia.
I haven’t seen a single post about Somalia. Where are all the “activists” on tumblr who were making a huge fucking deal over shit going on in the world and making themselves look like saints for caring so much. SMFH, guys.
Jul 23rd
1 tag
I really like being pet on the head. It makes me feel really cute.
Jul 23rd
2 notes
Our time together is almost up.
But you don’t even see me as anything special.
Jul 23rd
I think my mom is going to send me to New York on the weekend of my grandmama’s birthday, which is the first week of August. And if I feel like I can really be happy there, I’m going to be living with my cousins for a few months or something like that. But I don’t think it’ll work unless my mom goes there with me. Ugh. I’m not sure of what to do. 
Jul 23rd
1 note
inspiringindepentalit-y asked: T-T k moving to LA now
Jul 22nd
1 note
CRYCRYCRY
Goddammit, I really wanted to buy a 3DS so I can play Mario, Pokemon, and all that cool shit FOR THE FIRST FUCKING TIME OF MY LIFE EVER. And then I find out most of the otome games I want to play are on PSP.
Jul 22nd
I had this dream about a week or two ago. I just never found the time to post it on tumblr. It was probably the most awesome dream ever. I was a superhero. I have no idea what my powers were but I was in the League with other superheros. And I think Marvel and DC were joined along with some other superheros my head made up to make this ultimate league. And we were living in cabins and going...
Jul 22nd
4 notes
1 tag
Jul 22nd
9,360 notes
It’s so funny how I’ve been craving some sort of happiness again and once I get it, I doubt myself all over again. Is this true happiness? I’m popping pills every night to get through the next day, so is this really the kind of happiness I’ve wanted? I miss two days of medication and sadness just takes over my body and paralyzes me. I lay in bed all day without the will to...
Jul 22nd
1 note
I went to Guitar Center for the first time ever today. @lldeejeell took me there. You guys, his guitars are seriously handsome. But he’s even more handsome. Go follow (though he doesn’t really log in to tumblr much or posts pictures of himself, but you don’t need to concern yourselves with that).
Jul 22nd
Jul 22nd
39,293 notes
2 tags
너 정말 채쑤업써
I just really like how she says 재수없어.
Jul 21st
I’ve been really struggling the past month because of all the hospital bills that were coming in for both my mom’s and my surgery (I still haven’t paid mine, fml). They were all from pathology, anesthesia, doctors, oncology, radiology, and the hospital itself. The total was an impossible amount for us to pay. And they were threatening to send it to the collection agency if we...
Jul 20th
I’m pretty happy about 2NE1 TV season 3, but the static shit is getting on my nerves.
Jul 20th
Some people are just so fucking annoying.
Jul 17th
1 note
It’s my dad’s birthday tomorrow. He’s been calling me nonstop for about 2 weeks now but I haven’t picked up a single phone call from him (well, I did once but that was on accident). I don’t know why I’m being such a coward and avoiding him like this. I’m not even sure why he’s calling, but I feel like I don’t want to get myself involved at...
Jul 14th
July also brought ants into our home.
Fucking nasty little critters. They’re too goddamn tiny so MooMoo doesn’t even find any fun in pouncing on them.
Jul 13th
1 note
1 tag
Jul 13th
1,723 notes
I really hate you, cheekbones.
Jul 13th
2 notes
Cats really know the game of push and pull.
It makes me love MooMoo so much more when she tries to push me away and comes back to me to rub her scent all over me.
Jul 13th
Okay, I’m really self-conscious about my legs and I really like wearing tights. But it’s been way too hot to wear tights these days so I’ve been thinking of getting plain ones and ripping them so it wouldn’t be so stuffy and at the same time, it’ll look pretty trendy. Old-fashioned mom who was never self-conscious about her legs when she was my age because she was...
Jul 13th
2 notes
MYMOM
I’ve been bugging the hell out of her to make me promise that she’d watch Transformers, Harry Potter, and Captain America with me. But she hates watching movies, and I don’t really enjoy watching films with her too (I just don’t want to watch action alone). So she told her church group members that I’m a total loner loser and I need someone to watch movies with. The...
Jul 13th
2 notes
Sometimes, when I think about it seriously, I don’t look like anyone in my family. I look nothing like my mother or father. I might look like an estimated mesh of both their faces but really, my facial features look nothing like theirs. I don’t even look anything like my half-sister, brothers, cousins, not even my grandmama. What if I was actually adopted. Dun dun dun.
Jul 13th
1 note
2 tags
Jul 13th
7 notes
I really, really enjoy jigsaw puzzles. I didn’t even know I’d like it so much until I started taking my mom to the hospital for her radiation treatment. There are jigsaw puzzles with 1000 and 2000 pieces in the waiting room and it’s really fun. I feel so accomplished every time I match two pieces together from the hundreds of pieces scattered. I really want a jigsaw puzzle. But...
Jul 12th
6 notes
I swear to god, watching a movie with my mom is the hardest shit in the world.
Jul 12th