★金美思

I look really awkward when I dance. I look even thinner and taller and my limbs look extra long so...

Sat, 18 May 2013 22:06:54 -0700

I look really awkward when I dance.

I look even thinner and taller and my limbs look extra long so everything looks really awkward. Like sticks were just attached together and moving. I don’t know how to make myself look graceful. I can’t get over the fact that I look and feel like a giant.

I don’t think I was made to be a dancer.

Dancing stresses me out. I’m so exhausted right now.

justgetlays: :) LOLOLOL HELP I’M DYING AT WORK I...

Sat, 18 May 2013 07:17:00 -0700

justgetlays:

:)

LOLOLOL HELP I’M DYING AT WORK

I don’t know why aaron thinks i’m pretty HAHA

holy shit you look just like raina

Fri, 17 May 2013 13:44:00 -0700

AHAHAHA i think she lost some weight? She looks thinner in her recent selcas so I don’t think I look anything like her anymore LOL NOT THAT I EVER DID I JUST HEARD IT REALLY OFTEN
but thank you~ i think she’s really cute > u<

OMG WHAT AM I WEARING IN THAT PICTURE. ITS LIKE SOME PRINCE OUTFIT

Thu, 16 May 2013 19:00:33 -0700

LOL RUFFLESSSSSSSSS

IS THAT YOU LOL

Thu, 16 May 2013 10:56:39 -0700

AHAHAHAHAHAHAA I DON’T KNOW PEOPLE SAY I LOOK LIKE RAINA PROB BECAUSE WE BOTH HAVE TINY NOSES AND CHEEKBONES HAHA
but omg aaron looks like kim jae bum LOL

Do you have any other pictures with your boyfriend?

Thu, 16 May 2013 10:50:50 -0700

If you look through /tagged/blessakim I think there’s like 2 from months ago. But LOL THIS IS MY FAVORITE:

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHSDKLA;GD

your boyfriend seems sweet. what do you like about him?

Thu, 16 May 2013 02:51:14 -0700

LOL are you the one that asked him the same question? You naughty followers hahahaha
Well, it’s exactly that. HE’S SUPER SWEET he like satisfies my sweet tooth. And he does weird things with me HAHA. Like we make weird faces together and dance retarded and he’s always laughing WITH me, never AT me. He also gained my complete trust, which actually never happened before. By trust I can mean like I know I don’t have to worry about him looking at other girls or about where he is doing what. But I know for certain he means every single word he says to me and that he’s not just telling me what I want to hear while like 90% of his brain is focused on league or something HAHA. He’s super cute too. You should’ve seen him when I linked arms with him the other day HAHAHAHAHASDKL;AGE
And he’s still my best friend! It’s like nothing changed but everything got better.

can you tell us the full story how you got with your boyfriend? :)

Thu, 16 May 2013 02:22:40 -0700

LOL i’ll prob post it tomorrow i’m tired now - v-

thank you for always sharing us your thoughts. When I read your posts, I feel that I can learn from them...whether its about cats or to emotions. thanks :)

Wed, 15 May 2013 17:06:24 -0700

AWWW thank you for your message! I’ve always worried some people might read my posts and go, “omfg who cares” but wow, you’ve just given me a whole different view. I hope you’re having a lovely week *v*

dad?

Wed, 15 May 2013 13:04:07 -0700

My mom and I usually get a lot of phone calls from someone who doesn’t say anything. It’s really creepy and our home phone doesn’t have caller ID so we just always pick it up when we’re home.

But yesterday, an unknown number called my cell. Usually, I ignored unknowns or numbers not saved in my contacts but I just picked it up. As expected, no one answered when I said hello in both languages. So we just stayed quiet for a few seconds.

Cautiously, I said, “Dad?”

I heard something from their side that sounded like sudden movement. And then they hung up.

I have no idea what to think about this.

did you guys kiss yet? ;)

Wed, 15 May 2013 09:06:43 -0700

SDKAL;HEIFDLKA; EA;D LOLOLOLOLOL

NOOOOOOO WE CAN’T EVEN TOUCH EACH OTHER WITHOUT FEELING EMBARRASSED AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Yay! I am happy for you :)

Wed, 15 May 2013 06:03:19 -0700

Thank you! - v- I’m really happy too heehee

blessakim: Hello~ It’s been a while! I’ve missed a lot of...

Tue, 14 May 2013 13:55:00 -0700

blessakim:

Hello~ It’s been a while! I’ve missed a lot of messages during my absence, but thanks for all your concern!

I had dinner with @aaron and friends few nights ago. We like being creepy - u-

Uh, yeah, this is us HAHA we’re so funnay

thanks for all the love, everybody~~

WE DIDN’T TAKE A PICTURE YESTERDAY THO WHYYYY

does your boyfriend have a tumblr?

Tue, 14 May 2013 13:52:00 -0700

oh wow you just asked the million dollar question didn’t you haha

He’s not as much of a tumblr addict as I am so he doesn’t have a lot of posts.

justgetlays.tumblr.com

yay i has a boipren

Tue, 14 May 2013 13:37:06 -0700

So basically, we both thought each other thought of each other as just friends. I thought he only saw me as a friend and he thought I just saw him as a friend. SIGH, WE’RE BOTH DENSE HAHA. But everything is okay now because now we’re together. Yaaaay~

Wow how many years has it been since I’ve had a boyfriend. Like 3 years? It feels so different though because we’ve been such good friends (minus the months i ignored him because I was scared of starting to like him LOL). I PUT HIM THROUGH SO MUCH EMOTIONAL PAIN THOUGH I FEEL SO BAD. So many things finally came out into the light and it felt so good to finally say everything because I was so scared to tell anyone for the longest time.

I honestly believe he’ll be able to turn me into a better person and hopefully I’ll have the same effect on him. But we’re so comfortable. It’s the best thing ever. I don’t find myself trying to hide some parts of me from him or worry about what he’ll think of me if I say or do something. And we had a good talk about a lot of things last night. He’s so awesome.

And if you’re my irl friend, we didn’t put it on facebook. I know there be some creepy as shit people out there and once a couple puts it on facebook all the people they’ve never even talked to for like 10 years start creepin’. I just wanted to let the people I care for know about it first.

But since I’m a daily life blogger I needed to write this down. This isn’t a very specific post haha but yeah if you guys are curious, I don’t mind questions - v-

Dear Misa: Love yourself. Start by accepting and forgiving yourself, your flaws, and your past mistakes. Accept the fact that you will make mistakes. Move on. These are what I'm trying to do now. And then depend on God. Love yourself and you will gain confidence. You have to accept who you are as a person before you love anybody else. I used to hate myself and always thought I was worthless. Good luck to you and I both.

Mon, 13 May 2013 10:40:48 -0700

This is the nicest encouragement. Thank you for this. I try loving myself but it seems like every time I take a step forward, I’m taking two steps back. Haha, but this is something I probably won’t give up doing because to give up on this is like giving up on happiness. Best of luck to you too~

life happened

Mon, 13 May 2013 02:36:24 -0700

I woke up at 1:30am for no fucking reason and I can’t seem to go back to sleep so here I am trying to organize my thoughts once again.

I seriously think I have the nastiest personality like I can flip 180 in a second and make someone feel like dirt. I mean, I don’t do it often but there are some things that trigger it and even though some people might be like, “Oh, that’s understandable,” I still wish I didn’t do it. For example, there’s this guy at church and he always fools around kind of with me but he’s kind of rough about it. I guess he doesn’t think I’m a girl or an adult so he just goes and pinches me really hard or pushes my head with his finger every 5 seconds. If I’m in a good mood I can let it slide but oh my god I was pretty annoyed today. And then he PULLED MY HAIR? I felt my face turn into the ugliest of scowls and I just looked at him in a way that would probably make him never want to touch me again. I felt kind of bad about it afterwards.

It’s stuff like this that makes me feel like I’m never gonna find a nice boy. Well, I found a nice boy but I’m definitely not the kind of person he should be seeing.

I don’t know what happened to me I used to be such a nice girl.

conclusion

Sun, 12 May 2013 02:35:28 -0700

I think it’s best if I try to keep some distance. And even if I feel a bit of pain, it wouldn’t be as bad.

I’m trying to do the right thing. I’m really trying hard to keep what we have. Except...

Sun, 12 May 2013 02:25:18 -0700

I’m trying to do the right thing. I’m really trying hard to keep what we have. Except I’m thinking way too hard about this all so doing the right thing is so hard to do. And it doesn’t help that everything he says, even if he’s just being the nice person he is like 110% of the time, I get like KDSLA;HIEKFDL;G

I’m so scared I’m gonna mess everything up. I’ve even thought about avoiding him again. But whenever I do that I feel so selfish and unfair so I’d rather not. It’s just, I don’t know how else to stop this madness and protect myself from walking into something I see plainly right in front of me.

I’m such an idiot.

I want to dominate him. DOES THAT SOUND WEIRD? I don’t know how else to put it into...

Sun, 12 May 2013 02:03:03 -0700

I want to dominate him.

DOES THAT SOUND WEIRD?

I don’t know how else to put it into words.

Okay, I’m not dense, I have never thought of myself as dense. I definitely know when boys like me but everything is just too foggy. Maybe it’s this uncertainty that makes me so restless and doubtful.

It’s really late and I’m super sleepy so I shouldn’t even be blogging.

But I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHY I LIKE THIS BOY. I’m so scared it’s like all these reasons meshed together to make, “just because.” I don’t think I’m even making any sense right now.

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME LIKE I SPENT THE PAST … I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW MANY YEARS I’VE BEEN SINGLE. But I’ve been doing really well. I even purposely avoided people for months because I knew I was going to start to feel something and I wanted to prevent that. And I really thought I was starting a clean slate but NO IT’S WORSE.

UGH I’M SO DISAPPOINTED WITH MYSELF CAN I JUST DIG A HOLE AND STAY THERE FOREVER.